Emotion Warzone.

So I never really understood what the real difference between following your heart or using your mind was to justify various situations, until I met “him”. I met this guy many years ago and although we never were in a “titled” relationship, we were good friends with benefits of course.  Till this day I question what it was that I felt for him, and if it was real or just my imagination of what kind of relationship I thought I was in.
 

After some years passed I even found myself using that dreaded four-letter word that either creates a beautiful world or destroys it! I honestly don’t know if that word came out my mouth because I thought it or because I felt it. I do know that there is a major difference, and when it’s hard to distinguish the difference that there’s a possibility both your heart and mind is in action simultaneously.
When I told him that I loved him I do believe that a huge part of it came from my heart, but my gut wasn’t all the way in sync with my thoughts about him. I may have just like the “idea” of being in love and psyched myself into thinking I meant it. My mind was in full control at this point.
 

I know this sounds off the wall and f#%^ed up, but I was a teenager and I never experienced using the word “love” with someone who wasn’t related to me. It was all new to me, but I really feel that you can confuse using your mind, to think you really care for someone, versus using your heart to solidify that there’s something deeper than just caring in existence. 
 

I’m still young and learning this whole emotion thing, but I know that when I follow my heart, based on my experiences, I am usually in the right direction.